Bill and Hillary are at the first baseball game of the season. The umpire walks up to the VIP section and yells something, and suddenly Clinton grabs Hillary by the collar and throws her over the side and onto the field. The stunned umpire shouted, "No, Mr. President! I said, 'Throw out the first PITCH!'"
Even though Chelsea is in California at Stanford, President Clinton is acting like she's still at the White House. Yesterday he invited all of her friends over for a pajama party.
President Clinton has vehemently denied that he told former intern Monica Lewinsky to lie. "What I actually said," claims the President, "was to lie down."